Edward's Cooking!
by Daphrodite MasLaFont
Summary: As we all know Edward comes over alot, and humans have to eat. He complains alot about how bad the food smells. One day Bella gets tired of it and tells Edward to cook. Romance. Fluff. Humor. First Fic! Please tell me what you think! One-Shot Sorta. ExB
1. Chapter 1: You Ordered Edward?

**_Disclaimer on profile._**

Okay. So Cheyanne-Nicole gave me this profile becouse she didn't like her story(s). I APOLOGIZE IF YOU LOVED HER STORY! But you can yell in a PM (or review *wink wink* then i will gladly yell at her. But she's going through some tough stuff right now. _Shes' discontinued her stories. _I guess is the point.. el oh el.

Summary: **So, as we all know** **Edward comes over alot, and humans have to eat. He complains alot about how bad the food smells. One day Bella gets tired of it and tells Edward to cook. Romance. Fluff. Humor. First Fic! Please tell me what you think!! One-Shot Sorta... R&R :D ExB**

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I was sitting in my room reading when there was a knock on my house door... I looked over to the clock. It showed it was, _5:08_. I shook my head and looked over to the window and sighed. It'd been a long week. Edward promised to show up tonight. I didn't know what he meant. I shrugged and ran to the door. Of course being me I had to trip over the rug. I picked myself up as I heard the doorbell ring. _BING BING BING BING!!!_ I sighed. Sometimes people can be so impatient.

"COMING!" I yelled and carefully descended the stairs.

As I reached the bottom of the stairs, I ran past Charlie. He was watching some football game. I rolled my eyes as I passed the couch.

"Someone's at the door, Bella." Charlie said.

"I know, Dad. I'll get it." I said then under my breath softly. _'Wouldn't want you to break your back or anything.'_

As I finally got to the door and opened it I smiled. It was Edward, in all his glory. He was about to ring the doorbell again. My eyes narrowed.

"Ring that door bell one more time…" I threatened, playfully.

Edward smiled my favorite crocked smile, as he pressed it again. "And what, love?"

I smiled and stepped back in an attempt to let him in. As he attempted to walk in the door I closed it again. He knocked on the door again softly.

"Bella! Get the dang door!" Charlie yelled.

You could almost hear Edwards' eyes roll.

"I will Dad!" I called. Then turned back to the door. "Who is it?" I asked.

"The pizza man." Edward said, sarcastically.

Charlie gasped. "BELLA! You Ordered Pizza!?" He said in mock hurt. We NEVER ordered pizza on Mondays' football nights. It was an unspoken rule.

"No Charlie. I didn't order pizza." I said as I opened the door

"Oh…" Charlie said as he came around the corner. "You ordered Edward?" He said confused.

"No, Dad. I didn't order Edward." I said trying to hide a giggle, without success. "Go back to your game Dad." I said. As Charlie turned away back to the television, I looked at Edward.

"Yes?" I prompted.

Edward dipped his head in a soft sigh. He released the full use of his eyes on me and said slowly and softly. "Isabella." He took a step forward and pulled me to him. "Bella. It isn't very nice to close the door on someone's face. Especially when they are here to see you." He grinned, as my breath and heart beat pick up speed.

I struggled and pulled away. "So, it's polite to irritate someone to death with a door bell, Mr. Impatience?"

He laughed and kissed my forehead. My breath got caught in my throat. "Breath, Love." He reminded me. I took a deep breath in. When he seemed satisfied with the amount of air to my lungs he pulled back far enough to see my face.

"I just wanted to see you. Alice had a vision that you were going to trip and split your head open!" He said quickly.

I narrowed my eyes again. I _knew_ he was lying. "I did trip, but my head didn't split open."

Edward just shook his head and smiled. "You are always tripping, love. I didn't say where you were going to trip."

I was still suspicious. "So why didn't you just come through the window?"

He just smiled. "I don't know."

I shook my head, what a human answer. "Alright, Come on in." I said with a sigh. "But I'm warning you. I still haven't made dinner."

Edward sighed and wrapped an arm around my waist and led me into the house. "Ewe. You have to make dinner?" He said with disgust. Edward still hadn't taken to the smell of human food.

I stopped in my tracks. Edward actually _stumbled_ forward. "You don't have to stay if you don't want to.." I said looking him in the eyes.

"No, I'll stay." He said and took my hand and led me to the kitchen. "What's for dinner?" He asked.

I laughed at his childishness. "Spaghetti." I stated simply.

Edward nodded and smiled. I shook my head and laughed. "Go sit down, Edward." I said as I made my way to the stove to put a pot of water on to boil.

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**Haahaa, What does Edward do to make Bella upset with him, and make him cook?**

**Review and maybe you'll know. ;)**

**- Every rose has its thorn Ox.**


	2. Chapter 2: Promise You Won't Get Mad?

****

**_Disclaimer on profile._**

Okay. So Cheyanne-Nicole gave me this profile because she didn't like her story(s). I APOLOGIZE IF YOU LOVED HER STORY! But you can yell in a PM (or review *wink wink* then i will gladly yell at her. But she's going through some tough stuff right now. _Shes' discontinued her stories. _I guess is the point.. el oh el.

Summary: **So, as we all know** **Edward comes over allot, and humans have to eat. He complains allot about how bad the food smells. One day Bella gets tired of it and tells Edward to cook. Romance. Fluff. Humor. First Fic! Please tell me what you think!! One-Shot Sorta... R&R :D ExB**

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**Previously:**

"_No, I'll stay." He said and took my hand and led me to the kitchen. "What's for dinner?" He asked._

_I laughed at his childishness. "Spaghetti." I stated simply._

_  
Edward nodded and smiled. I shook my head and laughed. "Go sit down, Edward." I said as I made my way to the stove to put a pot of water on to boil._

I started to hum a little melody as I walked around the kitchen. Every so often I would look over at Edward and see him smiling at me as a cooked. After I had the water at a boil I walked to the cabinet and took out the noodles, sauce, and mushrooms. I poured the noodles into the water. Then I pulled out another pot and started to pour the rest of the sauce into it.

I walked back to Edward and sat next to him as the food cooked. Edward smiled and pulled me to his lap and started to kiss up my jaw line. My breath got caught in my throat, and I closed my eyes. I slowly pushed Edward back.

"Eh… duh... ward..." I said breathlessly. "Stop." I said and pushed him back.

"Yes, Love?" Edward's velvet voice said.

"What if Charlie comes in?" I asked.

"Charlie's engulfed in the game." His voice said, since I haven' opened my eyes yet.

"Right.." I said. I'd momentarily forgotten about his ability to read minds. All of the sudden I felt Edward pull away and I sighed.

I pulled back and looked at him. "What's wrong?" I asked, and tilted my head.

Edward smiled. "Promise you wont get mad?"

I looked at him for a minute. "Mad? I can't make that, Promise."

He laughed and looked at me. "Fine…" He said and kissed my forehead before pushing my gently off his lap, and sat on the chair next to it.

I just stared at him. Several beats later Charlie walked in the room, but he continued, pretending that he wasn't there. "but ya, the Spaghetti sauce smells really, _really _bad. "

I rolled my eyes, and stood up angrily. Charlie took that cue to walk back out of the room without a word. "You think it smells bad?!" I asked loudly, but not loud enough to be considered a yell.

Edward, who was finding this funny, simply nodded his head and grinned.

I shook my head. That was _it!!!_ "Edward, If it smells so bad, why don't you go home? Or even better yet..." I said as an idea was forming in my head.

I smirked when Edward phone started ringing. I snatched it from the table before him. I stared at it for a moment before clicking 'ignore' on the phone. I'd been Alice. She was probably warning him about my idea. Edward just stared at me for a moment.

"Yes, Love?" He said trying to use his eyes on me.

"I'll talk to Alice… and _you_ get to cook Charlie's dinner." I smiled stood up. Walking quickly out of the kitchen and into the living room where Charlie was watching the game.

"Hey Charlie?" I asked.

He just moved his head slightly in acknowledgment.

I sighed and shook my head. "Edward's cooking dinner tonight. I hope you don't mind."

Charlie just waved his hand then jumped up and pumping his fist into the air as his team scored. I rolled my eyes and walked back into the kitchen. When I walked in, WHAT A SIGHT TO SEE! Edward was covered in tomato sauce and the kitchen was a disaster!

"Edward..." Was all I said and looked up at him.

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**el oh el. **

**I didn't get any reviews last chapter but i did get alerts so, I will try and continue this little one-shot thingy.  
What did edward do to poor bella's kitchen, how will it be fixed?**

**Review and maybe you'll know. ;)**

**- Every rose has its thorn Ox.**


	3. Chapter 3: Yes Love?

**Disclaimer on profile.**

**Okay. So Cheyanne-Nicole gave me this profile because she didn't like her story(s). I APOLOGIZE IF YOU LOVED HER STORY! But you can yell in a PM (or review *wink wink* then i will gladly yell at her. But she's going through some tough stuff right now. Shes' discontinued her stories. I guess is the point.. el oh el.**

Summary: **So, as we all know Edward comes over allot, and humans have to eat. He complains allot about how bad the food smells. One day Bella gets tired of it and tells Edward to cook. Romance. Fluff. Humor. First Fic! Please tell me what you think!! One-Shot Sorta... R&R :D ExB**

I wanna thank the people who review'd last chapter. It made my night. :)

1201, sorcerergirl90, and water raven.

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**Previously:**

_I sighed and shook my head. "Edward's cooking dinner tonight. I hope you don't mind."_

_Charlie just waved his hand then jumped up and pumping his fist into the air as his team scored. I rolled my eyes and walked back into the kitchen. When I walked in, WHAT A SIGHT TO SEE! Edward was covered in tomato sauce and the kitchen was a disaster!_

"_Edward..." Was all I said and looked up at him._

"Bella…" He said.

I placed my hand over my mouth and let out a giggle. "Aw. Eddie. What did you do?"

Edward turned a hard glare at me. "Don't laugh… I always see you putting things into the microwave and wanted to try that out…" He smiled, and shrugged his shoulders.

"Let me guess." I said and started to move slowly towards the counter. "The microwave blew up?"

Edward just nodded slowly. I looked up at his face and burst out laughing. It was just so funny. I couldn't help myself.

He looked at me for a minute the then smiled. "Belllaaa…" He said.

I just smiled and tilted my head slowly. "Yes, Love?" I mimicked his words with a grin.

"You wouldn't…." He trailed off suggestively.

As he was talking I looked down to my pocket where his phone was and smiled. "Wouldn't what?"

"Oh you know. The usual... Read… cook Charlie's dinner… Take pictures with my phone and send them to everyone on my contact list?!" He said.

I smirked lazily. "Oh I just might…" I said with a wicked grin.

Edward looked like he was about to attack me.

"Edward…" I said as I pulled out his phone. "You touch me and I will take pictures, faster than a vampire running in the woods."

Edward raised an eyebrow. "You wouldn't be able to move that fast."

"Try me." I said in a harsh tone.

He looked at me for moment and I just smiled back at him.

"Fine…" He said reluctantly.

"Now." I started. "I'll give you some pointers but I won't cook for you."

I could see his face light up slightly. Somehow I thought he was planning on making me mad just so he could cook. THAT LITTLE CREEP. Well, fine. I'll play this game. Edward smiled at me and came forward to kiss my forehead. I stepped back a few steps.

"Wha…?" He asked confused.

"No kisses till you cook the meal and get this mess cleaned up." I said with authority clearly ringing in my voice.

"But-" He started but I interrupted him. "No buts, Mister." He said and walked away like a puppy with its tail in between its legs. I laughed slightly as I imagined Jacob. I shook my head to clear my thoughts.

"Okay, First things first." I said as Edward turned to look at me still upset. "Aw... Eddie! Don't be that way…" I said.

Edward sighed slightly. "But... You called me, sister!"

I raised and eyebrow at Edward and let out a hollow laugh. "No, Edward, I said Mister. M-I-S-T-E-R. Mister!" I said laughing and my face turning red.

"Oh..." He mumbled.

I laughed and took a quick picture on his cell phone his head snapped up and he looked at me his eyes narrowed.

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**UH-OH!! Bad Bella. No PICTURES. ehehe  
Aw! i loved the reviews i got last chapter. :D thanks you guys. :P**

**I'm glad you all find this funny. :) **

**Review to see what happens next! :D**

**- Every rose has its thorn Ox.**


	4. Chapter 4: Wanted to see what you'd say?

**Disclaimer on profile.**

**Okay. So Cheyanne-Nicole gave me this profile because she didn't like her story(s). I APOLOGIZE IF YOU LOVED HER STORY! But you can yell in a PM (or review *wink wink* then i will gladly yell at her. But she's going through some tough stuff right now. Shes' discontinued her stories. I guess is the point.. el oh el.**

Summary: **So, as we all know Edward comes over allot, and humans have to eat. He complains allot about how bad the food smells. One day Bella gets tired of it and tells Edward to cook. Romance. Fluff. Humor. First Fic! Please tell me what you think!! One-Shot Sorta... R&R :D ExB**

**Previously:**

_Edward sighed slightly. "But... You called me, sister!"_

_I raised and eyebrow at Edward and let out a hollow laugh. "No, Edward, I said Mister. M-I-S-T-E-R. Mister!" I said laughing and my face turning red._

"_Oh..." He mumbled._

_I laughed and took a quick picture on his cell phone his head snapped up and he looked at me his eyes narrowed._

"Uh…Oh..." I said slowly with a laugh.

"Uh-Oh, is right." He said as he slowly came towards me. "Bella, Bella Bella…" He said whilist shaking his head.

"That's my name… " I said with a chocking laugh.

"Don't wear it out?" He said with a mocking laughed.

I slowly nodded my head. Not really scared but scared.

You know that feeling that you get when someone is running after you, and you think your scared but when you turn around and it just your brother without a mask? That's the kinda scared if felt.

I swallowed the saliva that had collected in my throat.

Edward just smiled, and laughed. "Just take the pictures to settle your mind." He said.

I grinned and took a couple more before safely putting the phone in my back pocket. He wouldn't go into that pocket. Or at least I hope he wouldn't.

"Okay, now we have to clean this mess up." I said.

Edward nodded his head eagerly.

I laughed. "Well, Get cleaning..!" I said with authority.

"Yes Ma'am!" He said and turned to face the mess. He ran a hand through his bronze hair again.

I quickly whispered to him. "Underneath the sink, is some cleaning tools."

Edward nodded his head. "Pffft! I knew that…"

I rolled my eyes. "Sure ya did!"

He smiled and looked at me. "But I did."

"Then why did you look lost?" I asked.

"Er… Cause I wanted to see what you would do?" He said it like a question.

I shook my head and laughed. "that was lame."

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_Update as of 3/31/09._

**Please Review! I've gotten 10! Yay.. :P**

**- Every rose has it's thorn Ox.**


	5. Chapter 5: Seven?

**Disclaimer on profile.**

**Okay. So Cheyanne-Nicole gave me this profile because she didn't like her story(s). I APOLOGIZE IF YOU LOVED HER STORY! But you can yell in a PM (or review *wink wink* then I will gladly yell at her. But she's going through some tough stuff right now. She's' discontinued her stories. I guess is the point... el oh el.**

Summary: **So, as we all know Edward comes over allot, and humans have to eat. He complains allot about how bad the food smells. One day Bella gets tired of it and tells Edward to cook. Romance. Fluff. Humor. First Fiction! Please tell me what you think!! A one shot sort of. R&R :D ExB**

* * *

Thank you to all who reviewed. =D It means a lot to me.

_He smiled and looked at me. "But I did."_

"_Then why did you look lost?" I asked._

"_Err… Cause I wanted to see what you would do?" He said it like a question._

_I shook my head and laughed. "That was lame."_

Edward laughed. "I've been known to be lame every once in awhile."

I rolled my eyes. "Edward, I think you should bend down and get the cleaning supplies. I. Am. Not. Helping. Clean this mess up." I said again with as much of authority as I could muster.

Edward looked like he could have cried if he was able to. But I knew he couldn't so I just stared back. Eventually he sighed and said. "Yes, ma'am, If you say so."

"I do." I said. Edward quickly looked at me. The expression on face was clear.

"Wedding, Bells?" Suddenly a voice came from behind me that caused me to jump.

I quickly turned to see Charlie standing there. "Isabella? Are you okay? You seem a little off."

"Oh? Me? Yea, I'm… Great! Perfect. I mean… Yea, I am." I shook my head. I could hear Edward chuckling. I turned to him with a glare plastered on my eyes. (**A/n: that doesn't make sense)**

"Um… Yea. What brings you in here, dad?" I asked.

"Um... I heard yelling... laughing... and err... I think I heard something crash..." Charlie said looking kind of sad.

I looked at Edward and our eyes met. "Um… Nope. Everything's fine in here dad." I looked back at him. "Edward is just getting, some uh… cooking tips." I said with a grin.

Edward behind me scoffed.

"Oops!" I said and quickly covered my mouth. "Did I just tell him something I wasn't supposed to, Edward?" I looked at him quickly and blushed.

He looked back at me with a sigh.

I looked at my dad with a slight grin on my face.

"Don't worry Chief Swan, I'm watching her." Edward said softly.

"She's not the one I'm worried about, son." Charlie said.

'_Son,' _I thought quickly. '_did he just call him, son?!" _

Charlie walked over to me and kissed the top of my head with a sigh. He bent down and whispered into my ear, 'Remember this is my house and I'm watching you kid.'

I sighed. I knew Edward could hear him. "Yes, Dad, I know."

Charlie left the room walking backwards to prove his point.

Edward came up behind me and sighed, putting a hand on my waist.

"That makes six, seven people watching you, now." He said with a grin.

"Seven?!" I yelped. "What do you mean?" I asked turning to him.

"Cleaning supplies!" Edward said quickly. "I need those cleaning supplies!"

I smiled, and shook my head.

Edward grinned. "So… What do I need first?" He asked.

I laughed. "How many years with, Esme, and you have to ask me what you need?"

He grinned and laughed. "Okay, when she gets cleaning mode, I run"

I quickly rolled my eyes and laughed. "Just start cleaning and I'll start dinner. NO COMPLAINTS!"

Edward looked kind of shocked.

"Oh, yea!" I said, "I can be very authority-ized."

Edward then, still looking at me, momentarily. Two seconds later he was laughing his head off at me.

I took some of the tomato sauce that just happened to be laying on the counter, on the tip of my finger. I looked at Edward.

"I'd stop laughing if I was you."

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**:)**

**Review to see what happens next! :D**

**- Every rose has its thorn Ox.**


	6. Chapter 6: Can I Help You?

**Disclaimer on profile.**

**Okay. So Cheyanne-Nicole gave me this profile because she didn't like her story(s). I APOLOGIZE IF YOU LOVED HER STORY! But you can yell in a PM (or review *wink wink* then I will gladly yell at her. But she's going through some tough stuff right now. She's' discontinued her stories. I guess is the point... el oh el.**

Summary: **So, as we all know Edward comes over allot, and humans have to eat. He complains allot about how bad the food smells. One day Bella gets tired of it and tells Edward to cook. Romance. Fluff. Humor. First Fiction! Please tell me what you think!! A one shot sort of. R&R :D ExB**

* * *

_I took some of the tomato sauce that just happened to be laying on the counter, on the tip of my finger. I looked at Edward._

"_I'd stop laughing if I was you."_

I could have sworn I hear Edward gulp. Eward grinned mischievously at me. I grinned back and raised an eye brow. "Can I help you?" I asked innocently.

Edward just grinned, "No, Love. Not at all. I"ll just start with the cleaning…" He started to back away.

For some reason my body told me not to trust him. I watched him closely giggling. The next thing I knew, **SPLAT! **On my forehead, enough for me to slip on some spaghetti and slip. I landed on my butt and looked up. As it turned out Edward grabbed a meatball from the spaghetti bowl.

"You...I...WAR," I roared standing up quickly. Everything happened then extremely fast. We were all hiding behind our chair, which we were using for shields. The table had been pushed to the side allowing room for our miniature war that I had proclaimed.

A meatball came hurdling at me but I was ready and hit it away with another. I grabbed a fistful on tomatoes and started aiming them. All sorts of food was thrown at me but each time it was about to hit me I would try and duck. Some things hit me not many.

I looked across at Edward who was staring at me mischievously. He stood up as I was and ran over to me at human speed. Before I could react he forced me around and wrapped his arms around my waist. Usually I would be content but at this moment I was struggling with all my might to get away from my boyfriend. He lifted me slightly and walked over to the middle of the kitchen and let me go. I was lost a first but I grinned.

"Very Nice" He muttered.

"But I always win," Edward said and bent down to kiss me quickly on the mouth. By the time he we pulled away we were both gasping for air.

"Charlie's coming." He said and quickly pulled away.

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**I know that was SUPER short chapter I know! I super sorry but its all I could think of!**

**Thank you to all my reviewers and favorites. I need some help though. I don't know what to do, next? Should I just End it here? I mean, yea, one more chapter of them cleaning up and stuff then done? Help!**

**-Every rose has its thorn Ox.**


	7. Authors' Note

**Hey guys! This is CheyanneNicole, aka, Nicole, aka Nini.**

**Two things real quick. **

**1). Pen Name/Username Change;**

_**Adolescent Heart x3 **_To _**Daphrodie MasLaFont**_

**2) I was just wondering if I should go ahead and complete this story? **

**I personally think I've had it for sooooo long, and never finished it, so what the point of going on.  
****If you LOVEE IT, and believe that I should update it, and try and finish it with my slow acting brain, please let me know!  
****Also, I've improved on my writing so much that this isn't my best writing. I'll add a lot of detail, and probably end up deleting this in the near future. I'm throwing around a couple of Ideas in my head.. If anyone would like to hear them, please! Don't be afraid to PM me.**

**I'm always around... somewhere.  
nini..3**


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